Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Tyrone's Perfect Tush, Our First African-American President, and a Full Moon on Thursday

It is a celestial conspiracy that there is a full moon two days after the President's birthday.

It makes perfect sense.

Thousands of years ago, wise people charted the moon cycle to coincide precisely with this period in history.

8. 3. 2009: Crazy, batshit, loonybin Orly Taitz produces the "smoking" noodle that is the Kenyan "birth certificate" for our President.

8. 4. 2009: 218th day of this year. Barack Obama's birthday as 44th President of the United States. Age:48.

8. 6. 2009: The 8th full moon of this year.

8+3+2+9+8+4+2+9+218+44+48+8+6+2+9+8=388

1054 C.E.: A powerful supernova is observed. It is so bright it can be seen in the daylight. The remnant is now known as the Crab Nebula.

"It even has a well-established pedigree since it was sighted by royal Chinese astronomers when light from the supernova arrived here in 1054. The Crab Nebula and the star at the center of it are the Rosetta Stone of modern astrophysics" (Chandra Science Center).

Well-established pedigree?

1054-388=666.

Coincidence?

I think not.

The first full moon I ever saw I was ten years old riding the bus to school.

It was early morning and my African-American friend sharing the seat slid open the window, pulled down his pants, and showed his bare bottom to the side of the road. I had never seen such a beautiful contrast of perfect, smooth, dark skin and tighty whities. Haven't since.

Tell any birther, and they will find a way to make that part of the cover-up, too.

Tyrone Washington's flawless tush, the election of our first African-American president, and a full moon on Thursday.



Anything's plausible if you persistently twist the "facts" enough in your favor...

10 comments:

Riot Kitty August 4, 2009 at 1:33 AM  

OMG! Thanks for the laughs!

pottersfield August 4, 2009 at 8:15 AM  

I loved this. How hard did you have to work to get those numbers? I have a few friends that are getting this via email today. Another gem skyewriter.

Seeing Eye Chick August 4, 2009 at 8:50 AM  

Nothing worse than ametures get ahold of occult references to try and prove a biblical point.

They would be better off trying to use that shit to calculate winning powerball numbers.

Life is hard, and it is cyclical, just like our cultures on this planet. You have to be willing to work with whatever you have, to make due with what you got when things get tough.

My anger at Bush was to do with his abuse of our civil rights primarily, that threatened our ability to do what we need to to be good citizens. The abuse of cash was expected considering his past historical connections with the S&L scandal in the 80s. Just more of the same.

And that the Republicons would blame Obama for the sins of Bush, was also expected. Like that full moon, there are things that one can predict with alarming regularity, and that is the Republicans inability to take responsibility for their fiscal idiocy.

themom August 4, 2009 at 10:13 AM  

This was a great start to my day. Laughter is a great healer, thanks for the cure!

LeftLeaningLady August 4, 2009 at 11:10 AM  

You rock!

I can't address the "birther" BS, so I am incredibly appreciative that you do, showing them in a more stupid light than they show themselves.

skyewriter August 4, 2009 at 2:35 PM  

Glad to provide a laugh, Riot and themom.

Thanks, pottersfield. It *really* was hard to get those numbers to jibe just right...

As always, SEC, your comment blows my post away :).

LLL: I see you caved to the birfer pressure :).

Shady! How ya been? I cannot comment on your blog again... lovely veggies. I am so jealous.

And Cosa: you can always count on me to make perfect sense. Always. (Wipes tear from eye--face hurts from laughing really hard at that one.)

Sidhe August 4, 2009 at 2:49 PM  

Now, I understand everything including this compulsion I have to sacrifice a green pepper in the name of St. Hobbedly Gobbedly whilst nekkid booties dance around our outdoor furnace at precisely 8:38 this evening...

itdawnedonme August 9, 2009 at 2:29 PM  

That was great fun...thanks! I love that that birther lady is also a dentist, real estate agent, etc. besides being a lawyer. That's one creditialed lady. BTW, have we seen our law license? Mmmm.

Our president has a nice tush too! :))

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